Final cat sit of the year!!!!

WOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOO today I will be offski to do the final birther's cat sit of the year YAY.

However I will be returning to the birther's on the 30/31st of Dec, as it is the deal I made as I am having my birthday and christmas at my own home. And even worse christmas with my sperm donor *shock horror*.

Yeeeegads where the feck has this year gone?????

On the 29th of December it will be the 2 year anniversary of me getting my current abode :D WOW it has really been that long already???

I will post more when I don't feel like my head is about to explode.

zero energy!

I feel like someone has literally sucked all the energy out of my body :( Why? I did a family meal thingy today and they always drain every last ounce of my energy outa me.

It was a pleasent enough time, but I really don't like going to them.

But I am keeping my focus on going home again on Wednesday YAY, it may only be for a wekk but that is fine by me.

My girlies are slowly starting to forgive me for their annual trip to the vet on Friday past, and when I say slowly I mean slowly *rolls eyes*

Anyhooooo before my eyeballs dribble out of my head I will toodles.

progess report!

OK progress report on life at the mad cat house:

Life will shortly be returning to normalish service, my girlies are coming home YAY YAY YAY YAY.

My wetroom should be put back together tomorrow, the issue however is FAR from sorted *rolls eyes* in that I have no idea when or how long the actual problem will take to sort.

Had a truely shit day yesterday :(
Having gone to the local shop (a 5 minute walk for a "normal" person) to get a few wee things as I was standing at the till I passed out *shock*, this of course FREAKED my support worker and everyone in the shop out. Having spent 10 minutes persuading people not to phone an ambulance and that I just needed to go home, my support worker called a taxi to take me the 5 minutes up the road and stayed until I was feeling better.

I was so embarassed, how can I at 27 not be able to make it to my local shops and back without SOMETHING happening???????

I know why I passed out: pain. My bodies reaction to pain is to raise my tempature sky high, sweat pours off me and I get all dizzy, unfortunatly this time my body went that bit too far with it's reaction to the pain.

Today my knees look like footbalss, I can barely walk and am so freaking tired it ain't funny :(

DAMN YOU BODY

Not a happy bunny!

Can you see why?? This is what I have been left with for a wetrrom today *rolls eyes* Finally the workmen actually SHOWED UP to start the work to fix my wetroom drainage issues.

They ripped up my sparkly lino floor and then left saying they "hoped" to be back tomorrow or the day after, but that it would be "unlikely" that my new floor would be done before next week, out-fecking-ragous is what pops into my head.

I am even more troubled by the fact that the floor isn't exactly what you would call even or safe for me with my sticks to walk on.

I am truely pissed off right now and if they don't come back tomorrow they will be dealing with one VERY pissed off bunny, who will do what I have to to get this sorted that includes shafting them in the media if it comes to it.

The way I have been treated on EVERY single thing that has needed done onmy local authority flat is fecking outrageous, this one thing alone has taken OVER a year to get to this point.

What they think because I am a cripple (sorry I truely hate the word disabled) that I will just quietly let it happen?? BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA damn did they get that one wrong. They have fucked with the WRONG cripple.

another week, more workmen :(

So last week I had workmen in ripping out my very dated and useless kitchen and replacing it with something much more me friendly, also flipping my front door to open the other way. I am happy with 99.9% of it, but there is a wee bit that I need to chase up in the kitchen.

This coming week I have contractors coming in to rip out my wetroom floor and re-plumb under it and also now I found out digging up the drainage in my communal backgarden (ooo my neighbours will love me, NOT) and replacing that too. Am I looking forward to this??? NO, I have had to persuade my birther to take my girlies for another week whilst this is all going on, which means more sleepless nights (I struggle to sleep without my cats on the bed) and feeling so freaking lonely it ain't funny.

The birther has tried to persuade me to give the workmen keys to do the work and me not be there, but I am not sure I trust them to do the work, so I am going to see how I feel about it later.

Hair bez gone :D

OOoooooooo I love it, my long hair is now short and managable.

Why the heck have I not done this earlier I keep asking myself. Oh yeah cos I was a wimpy woos LOL

That is all for now :D

Royally screwed up!

Royally screwed up, yep that is what I am, do I blame my parents and my family for it?

Actually for a lot of it YES. I know to be like I am I had to already be messed up before I was even born, but hell my up bringing and what happened to me during my childhood has had a hell of a lot to do with the way I turned out.

Is it because my Mother was a sex worker or my Dad had a drug habit?
NO is the resounding answer to that question.

The way they both were without those factors was enough I reckon. Though I do thing that people's attitudes towards what my mother did for a living had a MAJOR effect on me.

Did my Grandmother sexually abusing me for years have anything to do with it??
HELL YES.

Did the mental abuse I suffered have anything to do with it???
I think so most definitely.

The fact my Mother knowingly slept with an HIV+ man with OUT protection and seemed to gloat about doing it to all who would listen when I was 13 have anything to do with it?
It taught me that my Mother had/has little or no respect for the consequences of her actions and the effect that they might have on others, so YES I learned that actually I really didn't matter to her that much.

Did my Mother taking me clubbing and pubbing from around 12/13 years old have anything to do with it??
I definitely did and learned things that NO young person should learn so early in life. Did it damage me? I am not really sure about that one, I know that I did the clubbing scene and got bored of it before a lot of people had even discovered it.

Do I wish my life had been different HELL YES, do I wish I could be "normal"? NAH WTF is normal anyhoo???